Still Awake

Here I am sitting here, WIDE AWAKE. Why? Damn...I sound like an old person. I should be out on a Friday Night, not sitting here at the computer. This is what happens when you push people away. They are all out and here I sit. O well.
I'm gonna join a gym.
It has come to my attention that I have started to wear a black shirt every single day. Not the same one mind you, but a black one neverless. I have a closet full of different colored tops...but it seems that I would rather wear black.
My head is starting to hurt again. Had a migraine yesterday and had to leave work. I've been thinking, maybe I should start taking my mirgaine meds again. I'm not sure though. I'm already a walking zombie from the meds I'm already takin.
I have had "control" all week. Yesterday I tried and tried...but nothing. Why do I feel guilty, not for doing that, for not being able to get anything up. Crap! After thinking that I now want to get up, feed, and then rush to the bathroom. Even though I have never binged before. I'm so not right in the head.
So glad that its Saturday. Now if only it would rain. Then it would be perfect.
I'm thinking about going to some flea markets tomorrow. Who knows. I might just lay in bed all day and read.
Speaking of reading, I'm currently reading "Paint it Black" By Janet Fitch. Awesome book so far. She is the author of White Oleander...never read it though. Havent seen the movie either. Dont matter, cause I'd rather read it then watch it.
I'm freakin freezing. I have no idea why Husband thinks he has to keep it so freakin cold in here.
I'm going to bed. Gonna snuggle down under my heating blanket and read myself to sleep.